Sunday, November 7, 2010

All You Have Is Yourself

Looking to outside sources for joy and happiness is a transient boost. Yet so many people surrender responsibility for their own happiness and look to things that they don't have to make them happy.

Instead of choosing to be happy right now, they think "if only I was five pounds lighter" or "if only I had that new watch" or "if only I had some more money."

Sentences that start with "if only" never do you much good. Inevitably, people who are locked into an "if only" mindset end up on a hamster wheel, and never reach their desired destination.

Believing that your happiness is dependant upon things is much like the sugar rush that comes from eating too much candy. It feels great for a brief time, but then it's gone, and you're worse off than you were before.

Years ago, in conversation a girl who worked for me outlined the list of cosmetic surgery procedures that she had planned out. Without exaggeration, she had mapped out a full head to toe surgical renovation of herself. Because I was more of an asshole than I am now, when she finished itemizing every body part she intended to "fix," I couldn't resist asking "And then you'll be happy, right?" Oblivious to my sarcasm, she nodded like a bobble head and said, "Oh, yes!"

Really, if you haven't chosen to be happy on the inside, regardless of what surrounds you, adding more stuff onto the pile isn't going to do it. More likely, you'll be just as empty inside as you were before.

Decide today that you deserve to be happy, and that you aren't dependant upon other people, places or things to make you so. If you have exigent circumstances in your life that are problems, figure out how to fix them, and move on. Don't end up on your death bed in old age thinking "if only..."

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